3-Day “End Your Fights—Not Your Relationship” Challenge.
Day 3: The Repair
You’ve made it to Day 3—congratulations. Today, you’ll learn how to move from a heated exchange into genuine resolution, so conflicts don’t just stop… they actually close.
Today’s Lesson
Quick Recap: Pause & Pivot
Over the last two days, you have:
- Paused before tension rose
- Used your Curious Pivot to shift from blame to clarity
Today, you’ll build on those steps to fully repair the relationship—every time.
Today’s Quick-Win: Execute the Repair Sequence
When you’ve paused and invited clarity, take it home with these steps:
- Propose a Shared Solution
“How about we _______________?” - Confirm Connection
“I value us, and I want you to know you matter.” - Seal the Repair
A brief touch, a nod, or a calm statement:
“Thank you for talking this through.”
Use your worksheet to draft your solution and confirmation. Next time you wrap up a tough talk, follow these steps—and note what shifts.
You now have the full process to end fights before they start, steer them toward understanding, and repair fully. Tomorrow, look for my email with an invitation to continue this work in the full Intentional Relationship Course.
You’ve got everything you need—go show up differently today.
In partnership,
Anthony
P.S. If you haven’t yet, take a moment now to practice your Repair Sequence on today’s worksheet. You’ll notice the difference immediately.
Worksheet Day 3: Complete the Repair Sequence
How to Use This Worksheet
- Before your next conflict, review Sections A–C and prepare your responses.
- During the conflict, apply the four steps.
- Afterward, fill in Section D with your observations.
A. Identify a Conflict to Repair
Choose one recent disagreement you’d like to resolve fully. Describe:
- What was the issue?
- What was said or done?
- How it ended (tone, distance, unresolved feelings).
Issue Description | What Happened | How It Ended |
B. Refine Your Curious Pivot
Use yesterday’s Pivot formula. Fill in:
“I can see you’re feeling __________________. Help me understand __________________________.”
C. Draft Your Shared Solution & Confirmation
- Shared Solution: Propose a concrete step that addresses both your needs.
- Confirmation: Affirm your commitment to the relationship.
Shared Solution (What I’ll Do) | Confirmation (What I’ll Say) |
e.g., “I’ll leave work by 5:30 on Mon/Thu so we….” | e.g., “You matter most to me, and I’m committed…” |
D. Apply & Reflect
After using the full sequence (Pause → Pivot → Solution → Confirmation), note:
What I Did (Brief) | How They Responded | What I Felt |
E. Your Commitment Statement
Write one clear sentence you’ll repeat tonight:
“From now on, when we disagree about ______________, I will ________________, so we can ________.”
Congratulations! You’ve mastered the Repair Sequence. You now have a complete process to end arguments before they start, steer them into understanding, and repair fully.